What Do We Want This Home to Feel Like?
A Reflection on the Environment of Christ Episcopal Church
Dr. John Delony, bestselling author and public mental health intellectual, asks a question that cuts through the noise of modern life:
“What do you want your life to feel like?”
Not what you want to accomplish. Not what you want to own. But what do you want it to feel like at work, at home, on your commute, etc? Because so many of us—if we’re honest—are just trying to get through the week, to survive another round of meetings, bills, schedules, and responsibilities. And far too often, we approach church the same way—an obligation or opportunity on the todo list.
But here at Christ Episcopal Church, we’re invited to ask a deeper question:
What do we want this home—this church—to feel like?
Do we want it to feel like a place of gathering and belonging?
Like a space filled with laughter, peace, sacred silence, and deep conversation?
Do we want it to feel like family—not the polished, perfect kind, but the kind that shows up anyway? Do we want it to feel like a holy place to rest and recharge, to cry and rejoice, to serve and be seen?
That’s a beautiful vision - but it doesn’t happen by accident. And it doesn’t happen by hoping someone else will make it so.
It happens when we all decide to stop being consumers of a religious experience and start becoming practitioners of the Kingdom of God.
It’s one thing to hope that Christ Church will feel like home.
It’s another thing entirely to build it that way—together.
So how do we do that? How do we move from attending a church that feels peaceful to helping create that peace?
How do we move from admiring hospitality to offering it?
How do we move from appreciating deep worship to participating in it with our full presence, voice, and heart?
Here are a few quiet but powerful steps:
Greet someone you don’t know—and mean it.
Say “yes” to helping with something, even if it’s small.
Show up early and stay late—not to be busy, but to be available.
Invite someone to coffee—not for a project, but just for a connection.
Pray before you enter the sanctuary: “God, help me bring peace into this space.”
Sing, even if you don’t feel like it—because joy isn’t a mood, it’s a choice.
Offer what you have: your story, your time, your listening ear, your casserole.
Refuse to let church be a place you “go”—and instead let it be a life you share.
We are not here to merely survive another Sunday.
We are here to invite God to make this life, and this space, come alive.
To ask not just, “What can I get?” but, “What can I give to make this feel more like Christ’s love?”
This is how a building becomes a sanctuary.
This is how a gathering becomes a home.
This is how Christ Episcopal Church becomes not just the place we go,
but the people we are.
So let’s ask again—
What do we want this home to feel like?
And then let’s get to the holy work of making it so.
Together. With God. In love.
Pax et Bonum!
Fr. Ben +
